You’ve checked everyone off your gift list. You’re exhausted and relieved there’s no more shopping to do. You’re done! Wait, what about the stockings? Oh, no! Don’t panic. Instead of scouring the house for old Halloween candy to cram into those oversized socks, why not use this as the perfect opportunity to get more intimate on Christmas night? I scoured the web (and my own nightstand) for the best sexy stuffers that will be sure get your partner’s attention. And, since you’ve spent enough time at the mall, I found great items you can order online. Don’t worry, they arrive at your doorstep in very discreet packaging so no one will know what you’re up to! So relax, sit back, have a glass of cider and check out my list of sensual stocking stuffers.
This slightly curved clitoral vibe is small (3.75 x 1.75) and a lot stronger and than it looks. It’s quiet so you can take it anywhere, rechargeable and waterproof so there’s no fuss, and has 8 powerful vibration patterns to keep your curiosity piqued. We-Vibe is known for their couple’s vibes however the We-Vibe Touch was made to be used solo or placed strategically during sex for a super-charged climax. So in a way, it’s a gift for both of you. $89.99 http://www.adameve.com/adult-sex-toys/vibrators/clit-vibrators/sp-we-vibe-touch-83554.aspx
Tantus Super Soft C-Ring and C-Sling
What if you could give him a longer orgasm for Christmas? C-Rings (Cock rings) are an easy and inexpensive way to experiment with sex toys and Tantus has a nice variety to choose from without being overwhelming. C-rings are used to constrict the penis’s blood flow just enough to delay ejaculation a bit. Most men say this can extend their orgasms from a few seconds without a C-Ring to sometimes more than 30 with one. My choice, the Super Soft C-Ring, is stretchier than most in its class, which is great if he’s never used a cock ring before and at about $10 buck pretty inexpensive for quality materials. The C-Sling is the same principle except a little firmer with a gently rounded “scoop” that points toward the back, for those guys that like a little perineum stimulation. A little more money but, if taken care of properly, will be with you for many more Christmases to … uh … come. $9.99/$39.99 http://tantusinc.com/catalog/For-Him/?partner=LADYCHEEKY
Touch Me Erotic Massage Game and Sliquid Organics Massage Cube
Most people love a massage, especially when it’s given by a beloved partner. The Touch Me Erotic Massage Game will tell you what sensual massage move to try and the Sliquid Organics massage oil will make it sexier to do it with. The Sliquid Massage Cube is a small box with 12 pouches of different lightly scented organic massage oil so you can choose what scent suits your mood, or take a few pouches with you when you travel. The Touch Me Erotic Massage Game gives you a roadmap to erotic pleasure in a fun little game and best of all, is slim enough to pop in an overnight bag, or in this case … a stocking. Game $9.95 Massage Oil $14.95 www.thepleasurechest.com
Lucky Bloke Condom Samplers & Kits
Lucky Bloke puts together sampler packs containing an array of different condoms and/or lube from different companies and countries around the world. Choose from a variety of ultra thin condoms from Japan, vegan and flavored condoms from Australia, textured, glow-in the dark or just your basic Trojan lubed condom and more. Lucky Bloke will ship everything you choose quickly and discretely to your door. They also have special limited edition “Safe Sex Sampler Kits” curated by esteemed sex educators, as a cute option for holiday.* Regardless of which you choose, this is a unique and thoughtful gift perfectly made for a stocking. $6.99 and up www.luckybloke.com
Nothing says “I love you” more than the gift of self love. This cute little plastic egg contains a super soft, stretchy, silicone stroking sleeve (say that 3 times fast) and a little pouch of lube. The Tenga Egg comes in a variety of textures and allows a different sensation to please him whether it’s by himself or a partner giving him a “hand.” You don’t have to use the Tenga just for the penis, slip the sleeve over a toy like a vibrator for a different kind of sensation. The Tenga is intended for single use but if you take care to clean and store it well, you can certainly eek a few more sessions out of it. $8.50 http://www.goodvibes.com/display_product.jhtml?id=16CB06&lref=Srch_tenga_Products_2?kbid=154407
Lovelife Flex Kegel Exercisers
Many experts believe that exercising your pelvic floor muscles (PC muscles) could extend vaginal orgasms among other pleasure and health benefits. So if you’re going to exercise, why not do it in style? These adorable weighted, pink silicone hearts look good enough to eat. The box contains 3 different weights of exercisers so you can gradually build resistance, as your PC muscles get stronger. High quality silicone makes these body-safe and they come so beautifully packaged that you’ll want to put it under the tree instead. $45.00 http://www.shevibe.com/lovelife-flex-silicone-kegel-weights-by-ohmibod.aspx#oid=1032_1
So whether it’s your partner, your brother-in-law or your best friend, you now have a few ideas of fun and unique stocking stuffers that you can all discuss over Christmas breakfast … and beyond.
(*Full disclosure, I am one of them).